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I was shocked to death, I did not think that the moment would be immortalized by the committee. I felt like I wanted to pretend to be dead, I endured the shame my body felt hot and my knees felt weak.
"Ciieeee ciieee" the cheer of the cadres made me even float high over the shadow if indeed I would be made with Nanda. Lesi said that time was right, me and ended up with a taste to Nanda, I felt crazy and wanted to lose my memory.
"And you ain't papa?" Tanya Uci obliterated all my daydreams, she put the back of her hand on my forehead, I pegged for a moment and finally realized that I was becoming the topic of conversation of cadres and administrators.
I circulated my gaze, and stopped at the figure of Kusuma who was staring fixedly at the photo that was clearly displayed on the projector screen. His face upset me confused what was wrong with him, where maybe he put his heart on me.
"Oh, it's none of my business" I muttered again focusing on the projector screen.
Next is the distribution of gifts for the biggest groups, the best pensi, the best peseta daughters, and the most unique photos. Well on the name board there will be a photo of the owner of the nameplate of an older brother and an administrator where the photo is located on the left of the name.
And my group won the best art scene because it made some viewers cry because of it, I did not expect it to be so even though our preparation in a really short time and far from perfect. Maybe because imagining us while performing it made the audience feel touched.
...***...
The days passed as usual I was still a BEM cadre so only involved in two events to learn in organizing so that if I was elected to be the manager of the next period I already know what is it must be done by an organization manager.
I am still a butterfly student, and my daily life is just college, eating, sleeping, lying down, occasionally playing to the nearest tourist attractions or just hanging out with my boarding friends or classmates.
This course had just finished and I had stepped out of class as usual I passed the hall. I walked straight ahead regardless of the people around me.
"RANI" cried Kusuma's brother towards me, my steps stopped because of his greeting. He stepped towards me and stopped right in front of me he smiled sweetly at me, I felt he looked strange with that smile even though the smile had been repeatedly thrown at me.
"Ran, can I have your number?" He said suddenly, I was surprised because maybe the figure seemed to like a woman like me.
"Make what?" Ask me to fad about finding out, at least not to mode or interrupt my days.
"I may not be interested in continuing to be a manager" I continued to reject his request subtly, honestly I feel uncomfortable with his behavior lately.
"Ga is not about BEM but just want to deket aja" he replied still with a smile perched on his lips. She was sweet with her thick eyebrows and white skin but her movements horrified me when she wandered around me.
"Oh yes" I said, he handed me his phone and I typed my phone number, I handed him back and he took it back from my grasp.
"Okay, thanks Ran, you're not in class?" Her question seemed pleasant-natured and still faithfully stood before me.
"Udah is done, I'm going home" I replied trying to be as friendly as possible, I just don't want to be labeled a cocky sister because of the incident that night of the bonfire I ignored him.
"It just so happens that I also finished class to be escorted ga?" Asked I was surprised at his offer, I smiled faintly making an impression to make it look friendly.
"Do not bother you" refused me, why the whole world often troubles me. I just want to quickly go home to innocence without a hitch, I want to fall down, please don't block my path.
"Do not hesitate to relax?" Ask him again, I shook my head quickly I thought I was looking for a reasonable reason so he would stop asking me to go home with him.
"Oh yes it is" he said put on a disappointed face, I know very well that Kusuma put his heart on me, but I I just want to rest in the love part of me, I will love someone again when my heart is ready to accept all the risks.
"I'm first, brother" I said and turned west of the hall, I patted my forehead I remembered one thing, perpus was on the east side of the hall, I was not a good con man.
My steps stopped behind the great wall of the hall barrier and hid for a moment waiting for Kusuma to leave, after which I would come out of my hiding.
I peeked out from behind the big wall in front of me, I saw Kusuma had disappeared from there, I rushed through the hall and about the return meeting I was lying, Ratna just did not come in because of illness.
My steps came to a halt when I found Kusuma in the waistline in front of the stairs out of the hall, I panicked and felt uncomfortable, what should I say if I had just lied to him.
"Eh see you again sis" I smiled grimly at him, I hope he withered because of my smile, I avoid him not because I hate him but I just want him to behave accordingly.
"Eemm, as I expected, I deserve to be confused since when the perpus moved to the west side of the hall" he said with a cynical look and frowned. I feel bad after what happened, come on. I don't want to argue with her anymore.
"I'm sorry, brother, I didn't mean to lie or anything, but I again needed to be alone" I said with condolences and lowered my head.
"Yes, I'm not going home there if you don't want to" she said gently, I nodded back my face and looked at her closely, she was not what I thought she was, he has a gentle personality and easily understands the feelings of others.
"Be aware Rani you are in phase move on" I muttered as slow as possible so as not to be heard by Kusuma. She was still standing in front of me with her sweet smile.
"My inner "sweetness" had my heart been ready to accept new people I might not have turned down her offer to go home together.
"I went home first brother" said I and he nodded slowly, I stepped out of the campus environment and I saw his body disappear behind the crowd of students.
...***...
The stack of books in front of me made my head almost smoky due to dizziness due to the increasing number of tasks from day to day.
"Why do I have to choose an Accounting program for college when I have said I can no longer, this is too complicated" I complained to myself in front of thick books like a dictionary.
I finished some of my tasks, I looked at the clock on the nightstand already showed ten o'clock at night, I started to get sleepy but I still have a lot of work left to do, I should probably continue tomorrow.
I threw my body on my bed to the ceiling of my room, I pondered for a moment why God chose the path I felt unable to walk. But I believe the choice of God is a good one, as soon as I remember my friends who can not go to college because of constrained costs, or even did not get a chance from the University they choose.
Drrr. Notifications emerged from my phone disperse my daydreams, guess my phone and open the latest message.
doni
Hi Rani how are you?
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