Hot Couple: Love Story Inara Season 3
The Wound Here

Before going upstairs, I washed my face and brushed my teeth in the bathroom. I wish that when I went into the room, Reza was asleep and I would just go up to bed. But apparently not, he wasn't in the room. For a moment I was grateful, I thought I better just curl up to the bed, and go straight to sleep. If I can't, I'd like to pretend to be asleep again. Again, I changed my mind when I realized the door to the veranda was unlocked. I thought Reza was outside. And I felt bad when I went to bed, but he was waiting for me and asked me to hurry back to the room. So yeah, that's it. I got out of bed and opened the door.

"Mas, it's night. Let's go to sleep."

She's looking. "In a moment," he said.

I nodded, and was about to close the door again, but...

"Darling?"

"Emm?"

"Guide me for a moment. Please?"

"Em, okay," I said, nodding.

"Cold, bring a blanket if you...."

I know what you mean, Mas. Without rebutting or uttering any rejections, I returned to the bed, pulled the blanket and carried it out. I sat next to her, then tucked the blanket over my body, and pretended to be indifferent to the Reza I knew -- she wanted me to plug the blanket into her body as well.

"The stars are beautiful, huh?" said.

"Yes," I said.

"Like you, the most beautiful star."

"You don't mind, do you, accompanying me?"

"If I mind, I'm not here."

"Em, can I come along... Your blanket?"

"Please" I said.

And I swear to what, maybe for those of you who have felt in my current position, it feels aw! Incredibly depressed. All wrong. Divorce is sick, and together is sick. Maybe some of the people out there can easily say: yes already, enjoy it, just go for it, or yes - just trust your husband. Or the last option: yes already, divorce only. But I swear, if you experience it yourself -- being in this position is very difficult. Hearts and egos were endlessly fighting great battles in my mind. I want to be selfish, but I feel sorry for my child. Want to make up, also pity yourself who are swayed by obscurity. I wanted to scream, but it would make me look like a madman. I could be more depressed.

"Can I hold your hand?"

Geez, without me noticing, my hand was already within his grasp. I'm nodding. "Byeah" I said. I took a deep breath. Do I have to do the same thing that Mother did? I just have to go through everything and swallow all the pain in every second I go through?

"Sick," she suddenly.

My tears are not held back. "Sama" I said. "Even more than you feel. There's a wound in here. In the same place always. Perih, Mas. It really hurts."

He looked at me, very deep. "What solution?" tanyakanya. "What I see, you even seem to refuse to fix our relationship. You limit yourself. You're refusing-"

"It's not. I. I just don't know...." I nodded with tears in my eyes. "You're not a girl. You will not understand my situation completely. It's hard to explain, Mom. I'm dilemma. I-i-"