Aster Veren
Episode 234

- Esther

I felt the gust of wind that hit my body tonight, along with it the eruption of fireworks really spoiled my eyes. Let alone the sound of the laughter of Khael and Yuna, then the commotion that had attracted my attention since then.

Not knowing what they were doing to make Carel leave, then along with that Kalea, Nadin and Tia ran up to me with the sound of their laughter that sounded very happy.

"Kan, I told you. That's a really good thing to bother that troublemaker." Tia Futur.

"Hahaha, you're right. I was satisfied to tease him haha ..," Nadin continued while embracing Tia's shoulder.

"Hah~ my stomach until it hurts because of you." Limpal Kalea before they stood beside me.

"Hay Aster, what are you doing here? Why didn't you join us?" Tia said as she got near me and wiped away the tears in the corner of her eyes.

"True, you should have joined us earlier." Nadin.

"You guys seem to be having fun ..," I said before smiling at them.

"Very!" Their words simultaneously surprised me.

***

"I think I just saw him go around here." I muttered I couldn't find Carel anywhere.

I intend to take her back because she's gone too long and make the others worry. But I haven't found it yet. I have searched all over the place.

"In his room there was also no ..," I continued muttering standing on the porch watching Sarah and Dean distancing himself from the others, the two of them seemed to be having fun playing with Yuna since uncle had already taken Khael away a few minutes ago.

The time has also shown at 09:00 pm, but the fireworks eruption is still continuing to decorate the sky. I should be happy, but somehow I don't feel happy in the least.

Was it because of Dean this afternoon? I can't stop thinking about that word. My mind remembers what Dean said before he left me with Carel.

"Not found it?" Tanya Teo surprised me. "Have you checked his room?" And then I looked towards him standing up.

"It was, but he wasn't in his room. Is he coming home?" I replied after shaking my head in a doldrums.

"Cannot be. I'm sure he's still around here. Is it possible that he went to a deserted place to smoke?" He muttered while holding his chin with his right hand.

"Wait on! Whahuh? What did you say?" I asked when I realized the word smoking coming out of Teo's mouth. I really didn't hear wrong, did I? She said Carel smoked?

"Eh—what?"

"Carel went to a deserted place to smoke?" My sister looked at him seriously.

"It ... hah~ right I said that. You didn't hear me wrong." He said after pausing his words and sighing briefly in a frustrated tone?

"Why? When did the boy smoke?" I ask again really not out of thought. How can Carel smoke? The person who aspires to become a doctor—anak it? Smoking cigarettes?

"Look back, Aster, I'll tell you." Teo tried to calm me down. I was surprised to be more patient to listen to what Teo was going to tell me.

Right now I want to run to find Carel and get angry with the boy. Could he be a smoker? Does he want to be a bad boy?

***

The reason Carel smoked is because of me? He suffered because of me. Though it wasn't long before her mother died, but I had already made a new wound by spreading the news of my death. His heart is hurt, right?

"... Carel smokes to find rest when he can't sleep. At first he was just trying because he could not continue to rely on sleeping pills, but over time it became his habit. In addition, he desperately rejected the reality of your death that day, until people thought he was crazy for being abandoned by the people he loved so much." Teo's voice came back to my head on my way to the backyard.

"People she cares about so much?"

"really. Everyone knows that Carel loves you so much."

"Carel love me?"

What the hell does that mean? What is your love as a friend? A brother? Or the opposite sex? I really don't understand. But if Teo's affection is something similar to what I think, could it be .. could it be that Carel also has the same feelings as me? My inner self, having brushed off my thoughts, will be my conversation with Teo.

"But I don't want to misunderstand and enjoy being alone like a fool. I have to make sure it goes straight." When I got to the back yard.

I looked at Carel's back that looked slumped, but usually he always showed his sturdy body. But now, I saw something I had never seen, I never saw it once when his mother died.

The gust of wind again blew tonight, making my body shiver a little because of the cold temperature. Then I faintly kissed the cigarette smoke around me before I saw a puff of smoke coming out of Carel's mouth.

"He really smokes." I felt so guilty about him. Because of my reckless plan, everyone suffers because of me.

Father's condition when I met him also looked very sad. Then now, I saw the figure of Carel who also looked pitiful. Standing alone with the cigarette in his hand, I don't know what he's thinking right now?

I want to get close to him, I really want to see him. But somehow my legs don't want to move, as if I knew, if I moved then Carel would be away from me. Not want! I don't want that to happen. But I also want to cheer him up.

... Okay, I've decided! My mind strengthened my resolve before wiping away my tears that had dripped from constantly staring at Carel's back.

"Hah~ sucks!" Carel's murmur rang into my ear, then I saw him throw a cigarette in his hand and stomp on it while rubbing his hair in frustration with his left hand.

"Carel?" I said after gathering all my courage, I saw Carel was already impressed by hearing my voice. He slowly turned to me who was still standing there watching him from earlier.

"Aster? What are you doing here? Where are the others?" He immediately turned to face me, I quickly ran up to him and plunged into his arms.

"A—Aster?"

"I'm sorry Carel ...,"

"Huh? Pardon you? What's for?" He asked a question, from his voice I could tell that he was very confused. Even her hands were trying to take my arms off her, but I was getting tighter and tighter.

"Look at me for a minute Aster." His words are still trying to release me in his arms.

"don't want. Just let me be like this for a minute .. can you?" I said trying to speak as best I could so that Carel would not be suspicious of my voice trembling slightly as it held back sobs.

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Thanks for reading...