DOOM
IN YOUR NAVEL I INTERSECTED
I push my nose into the middle of the ocean
Just to find yourself
But I finally found you
Crying over my belly
And I sing a song of sorrow in the silence of my regret.....
The uterus is short. On his bamboo bed he lay agitated. His eyes glared at the ceiling of the room full of spider webs that had blackened.
Tonight he was really not calm. Always agitated and wanted to feel like he tore his chest and let out all that unease from his heart. He no longer knew what to do, the feeling really felt like tearing his soul apart.
Tonight is the night that the woman he loves will give up everything for the man of his choice. It wasn't him who limped even crawling around wanting to kiss her beautiful legs. He felt he had been deceived by his own convictions, deceived by the patience and earnestness he hoped to end up with a wulan in his lap. Is not God according to the presumption of His Servant? Is not in the balk of patience and suffering stored happiness worth? Pih! Bulshits! Stupid time with all that. He's been waiting too long. Kowtowing down in hope begs God's willingness to grant his request, but what does he get out of it? The tranquility? Bah, what calm? Wasn't all he had been humiliating, humbled as low as unclean dog poop, spat on and reviled? When will he continue to suffer like that? Isn't tonight the last episode of her hope and wishful thinking to gain that adoration? Wouldn't the virgin's blood of the juwita be pooled on the bridal bedsheet? Tonight, well tonight.
The son of a man who has robbed everything of his hope. The funky monkey-kayak man who with all his advantages as a modern and bourgeois man has blinded the eyes of his beloved girl from the sincerity of the love she will give. The holy love that he will sacrifice on the altar of love. And why should it be because of the treasure, why should it be because of the beautiful face and why should the shoes that contain diamond gems that must dance cheerfully and he who is poor must succumb to fret in his hut reot?
The uterus again sighs short.******* which is accompanied by feelings of guilt. His eyes closed, his forehead shriveled and his mouth grimaced. The unease in his heart had dragged him to all the bad prejudices to God.
”Yes God...forgive me. I'm too tired, very tired. Forget what I said, God, forget it!....
The uterus then rises, trying its best to stand up and step outside the hut. Long he pensively stared at the dark night. The wind rustled against the bamboo leaves, stomping at the silence of the night. For a moment Rahim could feel the serenity begin to permeate his soul, but the sound of gamelan carried by the night breeze suddenly again shook his soul. The gamelan sound of Syifa's wedding party attendant, the girl he loved so much.
Dogs! Loud screams. Everything in front of him was instantly smashed into his fist. Blows and kicks blindly throw whatever is in front of him while continuing to curse furiously, furious when remembering how he is worth nothing on the stage of the play of God.
”Why Me should you make in my fragile soul, O Lord!
Why am I the one you have to put in this reot hut! Why did You create Women and Love if You want all Your Servants to bow down to You? Answer.....!
The cry of Rahim tore up the silence of the night, but it was not enough to make crickets and the crest of the night stop listening to the song of the night, as if mocking the fate of poor Rahim.
The uterus fell silent and fell on the ground. Just let her tears spill on her dull cheeks. Trying to lean resignedly on the fence of his reot hut. While raising his head, his head incessantly shook his head while smiling sinisterly. He mocked his unconscious self, no one even would and would listen to his groans. And God? Where is God when he needs it? What is God doing up there? Closing their ears or intentionally ordering the crickets to mock them?. Back Rahim smiled wryly looking at the dark sky. He felt that he had no more strength and he felt his body getting weaker and forced his body to crash on the ground.