We, From The First
#54. Gathering
Two Days Before...
Nico sat in the waiting room feeling riled up, waiting for the moment of his meeting with Papa Kandungnya after for a dozen years Nico never again saw his face.
During his life, Nico always imagined a time where he would be reunited with Papa Kandungnya. Nico had even prepared for the worst case scenario. It's just that, it never occurred to her mind that she would be reunited with her Papa Kandung as a defendant for the murder case that had wiped out the lives of both of Aira's parents. Recalling that again, it made Nico feel a tightness in his chest in the thump that crushed his heart.
The sound of the door opening, made Nico who had been silent since just now lowered her head immediately raised her face. From the doorway, Nico saw his father enter the room in a prisoner's suit, handcuffed, and guarded with one guard. For a few seconds, Nico forgot how to take a breath.
Bimantara Danadyaksa has an appearance that looks much older than his current age. Some of his hair was turning white, his body was thin, and he looked weak and helpless. Very different from the appearance of a dozen years ago that was so handsome, dashing, and authoritative.
When he finally saw the face of Papa Kandungnya back, Nico's memory inevitably dragged again in the moments of togetherness with the Papa dozens of years ago. That sweet old memory, inevitably made Nico's heart more and more he felt broken.
"Who does Al like the most in the world?"
"FATHER!"
"When you grow up, who does Al want to be?"
"FATHER!"
Without feeling the tears Nico flowed on his face. Realizing that, Nico hurriedly threw away his face and wiped away his tears.
"Alvin?" Lirih Bimantara with a trembling voice.
He looked deeper into Nico's face to make sure that what was in front of him was indeed Alvin, the son he had longed for.
"Are you really Alvin?" Lirih Bimantara once again.
He is closer to Nico. But at the same time, Nico reflexively got up from the chair he had been sitting in and stepped back. Although he has grown up to be a strong figure now, the memory of violence that used to be often carried out by his father is still a frightening specter in his subconscious.
That feeling of fear, was still deep and became an incurable wound in his soul.
Bimantara who realized Nico's refusal decided to stay away so that the distance was not too close. Bimantara could not dodge, from Nico's two eyes, he could still see very clearly that there was still pain left there.
"I'm sorry Papa, Al. Papa should be grateful that at least you still want to see your father here." Bimantara said as he wiped his tears with his handcuffed hands.
"Why did you kill them?" That one question immediately skated free even without Nico planning ahead of time.
Her brain only automatically recalls Aira's question to her four years ago; "Of so many people, why should I, Nic? Of all the people, why my parents? What are we wrong?"
"Alvin, Pa—Papa—" Bimantara starts racing. He did not know how to answer his son's question.
It would be very painful for Nico if he knew, that Bimantara had intended to kill him with his Mama and Papa Sambungnya. Bimantara really did not have the courage to tell the truth.
"I—itu h—only accident, Al. Pa—Papa..."
"ONLY? You said IT WAS JUST AN ACCIDENT?"
"I..."
Nico rubbed his face in frustration. He did not even have the energy to just hold his cry in front of this person.
"Why is it so easy to say 'JUST ACCIDENT' after you killed both parents of an innocent child? Why is it so easy to say 'JUST AN ACCIDENT' when you make a young girl's life ruined overnight?"
Instead of answering Nico's question, Bimantara actually felt suddenly his power drained. He then dropped his body on the chair while supporting his head which began to hurt.
"The reason I'm here today, standing in front of you, is because of the girl. The girl you killed her parents with, is the girl who made me survive to this day. If at that time I had not met him, now I might just be a man who had no purpose for all his life to continue to regret. Without him, I would have been blown to pieces. He's also the one who's been treating my wounds you've caused in the past."
"Al, forgive Papa. Papa's guilty." Bimantara said regretfully.
For the first time, her tears fell.
"I'M NICO, NOT ALVIN!!" Nico screams pretty hard.
And for the first time for Nico, he felt he did not want to be called 'Alvin'. The name he really misses all this time.
"You've taken her seal from my life, my childhood happiness, my name, and now, I might as well lose the girl I love because of you. Not only that, you even made me have to live life as someone else and throw away my true self."
After spilling everything he wanted to shed, Nico wiped away his tears. He took a deep breath, trying to regain his composure, before he finally looked courageously at Bimantara.
There was no more excitement from the look in his eyes.
"Don't call me your son anymore, it hurt me a lot. If you really feel guilty about me and my mom, then at least do one thing."
...****...
As soon as Nico came out of the Prisoner House, his steps immediately stopped when he saw the figure of his Mama who was standing with a look full of anger not far from him. The shocked Nico could do nothing as his Mama walked over, then landed a pretty loud slap on his face.
"Since when have you been the son of a dissident like this? Do you want to show the whole world that you are the son of Bimantara Danadyaksa?"
"Ma—"
"Now, you're coming with Mama... Alvin's."
Regina takes Nico home to their family's Penthouse on Banu Island. Once there, Regina tried to control her anger so as not to explode like before.
Regina looked at Nico who was sitting on the sofa with her face bowed deeply. Nico's trembling hands did not go unnoticed either.
"So, did you meet him because Aunt Diana asked and you couldn't resist, or on your own initiative? If it's on your own initiative, you have to explain, why you want to meet with him when Mama has warned you long before."
"I wonder why he killed Om Aldy and Aunt Shania."
"Then what? Did he tell you he was wrong? That he should have killed us and not them?"
"Mama, what is Mama—" This time Nico was really jolted at hearing his Mama's words.
And Regina who had just realized that Nico had not known to that extent, immediately regretted what she had just said. Unwittingly, Regina unlocks her own secret that she has been desperately hiding from Nico.
Regina had confessed, and she could no longer withdraw her confession.
"So you mean Mama, Nana and her parents took our place? So you mean Mama, who should be in Nana's position right now is Nico?"
Regina hurriedly grabbed Nico's hand and grasped it.
"Nico, dangeringin Mama. Control yourself!"
"Ma, did Nana live to suffer all this time because Nico had already taken her place?" Nico cried like a child.
Such great guilt towards Aira, now it had already filled her.
Regina cupped her son's face with both hands. The lines of anger that had been painted on his face had now disappeared without a trace.
"That's Mama's biggest reason, why Mama's always been forbidding you to find out about that person. Mama knows you won't be able to bear this much truth, Nico. That's also the reason why Mama once said, that if you want to be with Nana, you have to be Nico completely."
...****...
When he woke up from his sleep in the morning, Aira knew how to feel his body felt heavy. And he jumped in shock when he saw the hand of a man coiling on his stomach holding him from behind.
Aira also jumped down from the mattress while swiftly pulling the bolster and then smacked it on the person next to her many times. He's really panicking right now.
"Who are you? Why did you get in here?"
"Yes! Na's! It's me Nico. Stop!!" Nico said no less panicked when he felt someone beating him blindly with a roll.
"NICO?!" Pekik Aira half believing, half not.
Nico then rose from his position and revealed his still sleepy face.
"Yes, it's me. Hoaaaam..." Reply Nico while yawning.
After confirming that it was really Nico, Aira directly threw out the bolster in her hand somewhere before finally hugging Nico tightly.
"Nic, where have you been for four days? I'm worried, I think something happened to you." Aira again broke her cry in Nico's embrace.
"Sorry, huh? I left without Ngabarin." Said Nico gently as she stroked Aira's hair.
"I miss you, Nic. Hicks..."
"Yes, yes, I miss you too. I'm sorry again, aren't I?"
After the dramatic meeting, Aira immediately made breakfast for the two of them. While busy baking bread in the toaster, again Aira felt Nico hugging her body from behind while leaning her chin on Aira's shoulder.
"Now do you want to talk?" Bid Aira gently.
Aira was honestly curious about where Nico had gone for four days. But even if Nico didn't want to tell him, Aira wouldn't force it. He believes in Nico completely.
Moments later, Aira felt Nico's embrace begin to loosen and then come off. Aira turned around and looked at Nico's face carefully. Physically, Nico looks fine. But Aira knew, there must be something stuck in Nico now.
"I. ran out of Banu Island. I—" Nico let out a heavy-sounding sigh, he then closed his eyes, trying to hold the pain in his chest, "I've met the guy." Answer Nico honestly and also.
At first Nico thought that Aira would ask him more. But the next second, Aira took herself into Nico's arms and drowned her face in Nico's chest.
Rubbing Nico's back, Aira said, "you did well, Nic. I'm proud of you."
What made Nico want to cry now was, Aira did not even ask him anything as if she understood what Nico was feeling at that time.
"A—do you not want to know why I met him? Don't you want to ask anything about him?"
Aira shook her head with a single smile on her face, "i want to know. But if that's not something you can tell me, you don't have to say anything. At least until you siep. I believe in you, more than you believe in yourself, Nic."
Nico's crying was no longer contained. He grabbed the girl's body in his arms as if he didn't want to let go.
The sincerity that Aira passed on to her, only made Nico feel guilty. He increasingly felt unworthy of receiving the abundance of affection from Aira, whom he had inadvertently snatched away as well as his happiness.
To Be Continued...^^^