Ma Queen ROSE's
Rose: Concerns
Mona silently watched Adam and Rose sitting together. There was pain in her heart, but Mona tried to get her chest up. Although very heavy, Mona was determined that she would forget the sense that should not be on her best friend. He realized that this feeling would hurt many parties if it remained in defense. It's okay to hold back the pain a little, as long as Rose doesn't hate her then that's more than enough.
"Don't obey the promptings that ask you to continue to love Rose, Mona. You must remember that the whisper is not true. You're a normal girl, you can definitely get through this and have a decent life like Rose and the others. Don't be afraid of pain, okay?"
Liona smiled towards the girl who became the granddaughter of her husband's former confidant. He then walked closer to Mona who looked clumsy because she was caught watching Rose and Adam from afar. Like a mother, Liona stroked Mona's long hair that was broken just like that. His heart was sad, sad because this girl's life had been destroyed by biadap people who were very inhumane.
"Don't be ashamed and don't be afraid. No one hates you, so take it easy, okay?"
"Grandmother Liona, aren't you disgusted by me?" ask Mona Lirih.
"Disease? Because what?"
Because I'm dirty.
A small smile appeared on the corner of Liona's lips upon hearing the answer in Mona's mind. Looks like this girl is in the lema. But from this, Liona can draw the conclusion that Mona is not too dependent on her feelings for Rose. This girl started to come out of the red zone that had been shackling her heart and mind all along.
"Mona, everyone in this world must have done something wrong, even disgusting. But that doesn't mean that the person doesn't have a future to improve. So is yourselves. You asked if Grandma was disgusted by you or not? The answer is not at all. Remember Mona, what happened then and now is not of your own free will. You're the victim, you're the one who's at the most disadvantage over everything that's happened. If there are people who are disgusted by you, then Grandma will assume that the person is mentally ill. Because what? Because you're completely innocent!" liona said firmly. She had to help this girl strengthen her mentality which was already at the lowest point of her life.
"Sir, whether I can or not, I want to forget this feeling. I don't want to let everyone down, I want to live a normal life like Rose. But can I? Will there be a man who will accept me like this? I'm so dirty, Grandma. I even have a distorted disorder. I'm afraid of rejection, Grandma. Please help me to solve this problem. Me ... I," ....
"Ssssttt, relax. Breathe in slowly, then exhale."
Mona who had a little trouble breathing immediately followed Grandma Liona's direction. He breathed as deeply as possible and then exhaled slowly. This continued Mona repeat until the pounding on her chest gradually began to subside. If you want to know how he feels now, the answer is despair. Before Mona peeks at Adam and Rose, she thinks about committing suicide. But the intention he paled when he accidentally saw his grandmother who was joking with his grandfather and Grandpa Greg. Mona's mind was immediately filled with guilt if she could take away the happy smiles on the faces of her grandparents and replace them with tears of sadness. Perhaps Mona would be the most self-destructed grandchild in the world if she remained determined to end her life. As a result, Mona chose to forget all her feelings for Rose in order to maintain the feelings and happiness of people who had been very sincere in love with her.
"There's nothing instant in this world, baby. Nor can Grandma promise that there is a man who is willing to accept your shortcomings. However, you should know that in this world nothing is impossible if we try. Grandma knows what your heart's like now. Grandma also knows that your mind is in a great battle between wanting to let go or stay afloat with a sense that already exists."
Pause for a moment. Liona again continued to give advice while continuing to caress Mona's head which looked so frustrating.
"Is it possible, Grandma? I-I'm so scared. I also don't know if I can afford to tell him all the dark past or not. That's too disgusting for me, Grandma?" ask Mona tight.
Mona is normally a virgin. But somewhere else, she was still a girl who had once been a rotating trophy for some of those perverted men. It felt like Mona was suffocating every time she remembered the disgusting incident. Make it dark and want to end life so as not to continue to feel tormented.
"Darling, Grandma knows what you mean. And Grandma can't blame you for that disgust either. But Mona, there are so many women out there who work as entertainers of the night world whose past can be accepted by angel-hearted men. They are sinners, but they are willing to open a new leaf by not repeating the same mistakes. As for you, you did absolutely nothing wrong, dear. You are a pure victim. So you have to be able to convince yourself that someday you will be able to find a man who will and also understand the dark past that you have experienced first. And one more thing, never stop asking God. Because He is the best destiny of matchmaking. Ask Him to have a man in charge of your life. Grandma was sure God would answer the heartfelt prayers of His persecuted hanba!" liu replied wisely.
"Shall I beg God like that, Grandma?"
"Worthy, very fast. God never rejects His servant who comes with all grievances. Even a sinner receives it with an open heart. And so, ask Him. Reassure your heart with the prayers you wish to offer."
Mona and Liona continued to chat warmly as if they had such a close blood relationship. Liona lovingly continues to encourage Mona who is trapped by a feeling of dilemma. He unceasingly advised Mona who was still going back and forth in defense of her decision. It is difficult indeed, even Liona to get carried away because of Mona's words that easily flip back. But he tried to continue to be patient because after all Mona was very bad. So it is only natural that this girl is still swayed by a bad memory that has destroyed part of her life.
I'm sure you can, Mona. We are all here to support you. And also, we have prepared someone for you. Hopefully you guys are paired so that our relationship can get closer.
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