When Passion Is Greater Than Lust
The same problem

Tonight I am going home early. His face that usually always seemed innocent now even looks angry. I don't know what causes the face now like holding back emotions, as I remember today I did not do or say something that can provoke his emotions...

" You tell mommy, if we take Ti's blooms. It could be, as a wife you keep my dignity in front of your in-laws. Don't be a little confused ? like a kid..!"

Bang Dadang looked bulging, his jaw hardened and his tone was very audible if he was very angry.

I glanced at Dio and Bara who were a henchman with hape, thank God they were not disturbed by the sound of bang Dadang a little loud, Did bang Dadang not see the whereabouts of the children ?

" Not behind the bang, Lagian kok responsibility anyway, it should be that our household problems you report to mother, things like this you also say dong, dong, let my mother not accuse me of wasteful wife and do not think of the distress of the husband. Who told my mom anyway ? This is a village bang, many people lack gossip. So don't just recriminate.."

I still hold my voice, because to me mentally the children remain the first I have to think about.

" how come you so nyolot anyway, mother herself said she came to ask this same thing you.still want to argue you !!!"

" Mommy just asked, even the impression that I was even accused of being in debt. In part why is ashamed of your own mother, while with me you are lazy to appreciate, all of you let your mother know your behavior.."

I carried Bara and held Dio's hand to the room, If asked if I regretted having chosen Bang Dadang then the answer is no. Because even so, Bang Dadang is still the father of my children..

Not too long I lay down on our cotton mattress, I heard if the front door was opened and closed again, after which the door sounded locked from the outside.

Surely bang Dadang will be staying up again tonight. For some reason, I feel I have chosen the wrong location to build a house. The environment here is filled with Fathers who like to stay in coffee shops owned by Fatma, who also sell basic food. This is clearly a bad influence for my husband.

Before long, Bara and Dio had fallen asleep. Rama is not home, how many nights my eldest son chose to stay at the house of the Father.

Stay me alone who stared blankly at the roof of the house that has not been installed ceiling with watery eyes, I finally cried again.

***

Three months have now passed, my brain is increasingly crowded with thoughts about how to pay weekly and monthly installments, while bang Dadang even more looks relaxed without burden, he said, Our coffee garden has also been seen back into the forest again because it is not managed, and of course this is a neighbor's talk, because in fact I never saw it directly. The installment of riba debt has always been used as an excuse by bang Dadang as a cause he did not have time to see and even take care of it.

Now I prefer to be quiet, because indeed if we start a conversation, we will fight, but now the payment time that mepet unabated make bang Dadang even discuss it to me, even though he prefers to talk to me

'Casual.so long pay date'.

every time I remind him of his duties.

This turn of dizziness was even me who was also carried around, and told to think about what the solution was..

" Deck, where dong. Abang run out of ideas, want to borrow a bad father, want to borrow to the Hajj sir especially. Later even so his talk even though he had Hajj, but his mouth still lemes. Kayak women..

I had expected that this conversation would lead to a bude figure, but I chose to be indifferent and ignored the words bang Dadang.

" Dek, did you hear me talking ?"

" Hear this. Here's the phone, brother call himself.."

I put the hape in the hand of the bang Dadang, leaving my husband again.

Apparently my response made Bang Dadang upset, and now even standing in front of me ." Deck you fuckin' shit !! Your husband is hard, and he doesn't even want to help. What's so hard about calling Bude and talking "

" Now you know, what is the difficulty of calling Bude and talking to yourself !!"

" bude is your mother, why should I speak..Help kek, let bude be willing to lend.."

" Bang, you should be ashamed, I agreed when you suddenly said you want to take the bank money, I refused, but now you involve me when I was stuck like this. I don't want to, and about Bude, don't involve him with the problems you created yourself. You yourself are the one who said if you can afford to pay, well now .the time to prove..,"

" Deck, I used the money to finish this house. How come I ate all that money.."

" It's bang, it's !! But I don't mean you, it's your own initiative, and now don't involve me in thinking about the solution,.."

My husband was now silent, actually I was a bit anxious why the father and mother did not return the five million money at all until now. Though our economy is getting critical and causing this quarrel to drag on with the same problem.

Bang Dadang also seemed to have forgotten that, if I asked her fear even I was hit by my mother..

" Money used by Father how is it. What's wrong with you asking for help to repay, it's on our behalf when borrowing.."

Bang Dadang stopped his activities that had been playing billards in the hape . I was surprised if he could be that relaxed when we were discussing the issue of bank payments, the time is very urgent..

" Kok even so the money used by the father discussed, you should explain , they help us more than that, so let it be , do not discuss. unless you and your mother pay it directly, so let's not say, yes we accept .."

" Yes I know bang, but whose name is borrowed . It should be returned. Some of our conditions are like this, should be Father and mother, help it, maybe we need to remind them a little, about the money. ."

" i don't like the deck, you even calculate to my parents, besides the mother and father still need a lot of money for Salsa, because Salsa is the thesis.. You should know dong.."

"Well, don't talk to me about this anymore. Find your own solution . I take off my hands now, however, every time I talk and even blame, you want to continue the one you prioritize, even though you do not accept you should respond well, my proposal. Not to accuse me of evil and reckoning.."

I immediately took a hape who was in front of bang Dadang. Of course there was nothing I could do but leave immediately from before him..