Because I Don't Want to Lose
38 - Happy

When the weekend arrives, Anaya thinks Naira will ask for Ridwan's arrival. On the contrary, what happens is that the child does not remember that Saturday or Sunday is a schedule of togetherness with his biological father. When told that Ridwan could not pick her up, Naira was not disappointed at all. He even rushed to Izzar and asked him to take him to play to the kidzone. Apparently, the unpleasant incident with his father had formed a new defense in him.

"Come on!" Naira held onto Izzar's hand who was drawing the design.

"Later, yeah! I'm at work."

Naira scowls. Then he looked for Anaya who was preparing to go to work to oversee the engagement event held by his company.

"Mama, can you accompany me to kidzone?" Naira approaches Anaya.

"You want to go to work, son!" anaya replied while thinning her lips.

Naira's face grew sour. From the reflection of the mirror, Anaya could see disappointment in the look on her face.

"Why?" Anaya turns her attention to Naira.

"Why are you two so arrogant! Daddy works constantly, mommy works only!... It's a holiday, I'm just playing!" Naira's tears flowed down her chubby cheeks.

Anaya was shocked to hear it. She quickly hugged the tiny body beside her. He persuaded the little girl to stop sobbing. However, instead of subsiding, Naira instead cried harder and harder to invite Izzar to rush over.

"Why?"

Anaya briefly explains the cause of Naira's crying.

"You want to go?" tanya Izzar looked at Anaya. There was a lack of liking in his eyes that was being held back.

"Yes, I have an event." Anaya answered softly. He did not ask Izzar's permission before, because he was used to going to work on weekends without anyone's consent.

Izzar called Naira who was still in Anaya's arms with a wave of his hand. The little girl immediately ran over to Izzar.

"Can you wait another two hours, till you're done? Just let's go?" Izzar holds Naira's head.

The little girl stopped her crying. Mangangguk head.

"okay!" Izzar turned back to his room. Naira jumped up happily following him.

Meanwhile, the stunned Anaya bit her lips, feeling alienated left behind by the two people she loved. He hesitated to leave. Especially with the attitude of Izzar who seemed to dislike his plan.

Anaya crossed over to Izzar's room. Naira saw him coloring his picture book on the floor, and Izzar seriously stuck to his drawing table.

"Zar..." Anaya wrapped her hand around Izzar's shoulder.

"Yes?"

"Can I go?" ask Anaya.

"You don't need my permission, do you?"

For a moment Anaya was confused how to answer the question behind Izzar. He remained silent until Izzar looked up at him.

"Go, take care of your work. Let Naira be with me."

Anaya looked back at Izzar's face. Looking for sincerity there.

"Ikhla?" He also asked because he could not guess the flat expression of Izzar.

Instead of answering, Izzar returned to pursue the picture.

Izzar smile. His hands stretched out gently rubbing Anaya's chin. "It's the way there! You'll be late. I also need to quickly finish this picture.

After saying goodbye to Naira, Anaya left. He chose an online taxi instead of driving his car because it was more practical not to have to find parking.

The event the company is handling is a lavish engagement of celebrity children. When Anaya arrives at the location, her trusted project manager, Dian, approaches her immediately.

"All is safe, Mom!"

Anaya believes. He wandered around for a while, before meeting the parents of the stakeholders who looked a little tense. After making small talk, Anaya came back to Dian.

"Is there anything less, Mom?" ask Dian.

"Religious. Less what?" Anaya's confused. Because, what Dian and his team did was perfect for him.

"I saw Mom's face was very agitated, like there was nothing that fit it." replied Dian.

Anaya cupped her palms on her cheeks, although the anxiety Dian meant would not also be palpable to her skin. Then he paused for a moment, looking at his heart. He realized there was a lingering discomfort there, as a result of the incident this morning.

There is guilt towards Naira and Izzar. Anaya is not happy because Izzar is more often with Naira. Though she was his mother. In the past, when with Ridwan, he was often working on holidays because Ridwan tended to rely on him, making him the captain and cashier to pay for all their household needs.

Different from Izzar.  He did not burden Anaya and instead lightened her a lot. Especially since his income improved, Not only material, as busy as anything, this man always took time for Naira as well as himself. Anaya who often seems not to know herself. In fact, his men have been very professional and expert with their respective duties. The role itself doesn't really mean much here.

Notification of the incoming message on his phone, distracting Anaya's mind. The message was from Izzar, who told him that he and Naira were on their way to the mall, to the children's play area that Naira wanted.

Anaya was envious. He looked at Dian who was checking his tablet.

"Dian's? If I leave you, no problem, right?" ask Anaya.

"Related, Mom! Safe, really!"

"Can I go? I want to meet my son and my husband."

Dian smiled. "Please, Mom! Nothing at all. Like anything, later I can still call, right?"

In less than an hour, Anaya had arrived at the mall where Izzar and Naira were. He is grateful to wear semi-casual clothes, so that it is comfortable to move. He deliberately did not tell Izzar that he planned to follow him and Naira.

The children's play area is on the top floor. Anaya had to climb some escalators. Just as he was about to set foot on the second escalator, someone called his name.

"Annaya!"

Anaya's feet were already climbing the first step that continued to move carrying him up. With his hands held tight, he looked back. A man jumped onto the same escalator. Anaya stunned. That man is Tristan.

Tristan, who was left behind, jumped several steps after Anaya, and then stood with Anaya's fingers.

"Hi!" Tristan smiled as she greeted.

"Hi!" Anaya replied, keeping her distance.

"How are you, Nay?"

"Good."

Anaya knew she should also ask Tristan, but she was reluctant. The incident at the hotel used to make him careless adjacent to Tristan.

"alone?" ask Tristan.

"Religious. Same with my husband and son. They're in kidzone." Anaya landed her feet on the floor as the steps she stepped on reached the highest end.

Anaya hoped Tristan would back down after hearing her answer. But that guy doesn't seem to care. He continued to accompany Anaya's steps around and climbed the next escalator.

"I miss you, Nay! You don't miss me?"

Tristan's words shocked Anaya. A self-informed statement according to him.

"No!"

"Why? How can I not miss me?"

"I have a husband!" Anaya's tone of voice was somewhat elevated.

Tristan laughed instead. Anaya started to look at him.

"Why laugh?"

"You're not getting divorced?"

Although surprised to hear it, Anaya understood. He recalled, Sandra had told Tristan that she was in trouble with Izzar and would be separated. He himself also believed the same thing at that time, because the marriage contract was agreed, Now, of course he hopes otherwise.

"Related!" Anaya answered for sure.

"Related?"

Anaya stopped her steps. They've reached the top floor. The children's play area is just a few steps away.

"Why do you doubt my marriage?" Anaya looked hard at Tristan.

"I'm not sure you're happy."

"Why do you think that?" ask Anaya again.

"We were close yesterday, Nay. I know you're not happy" replied Tristan.

Anaya fell silent. He admitted he was indeed at that time his heart was chaotic.

"I can make you happy, Nay." Tristan reached out his hand to grab Anaya's hand.

Tristan's manoeuvre pushed Anaya a step back.

"Don't bother me anymore, Tris. Sorry if I could give you hope... But now my condition is different. The name of marriage must have problems. But, right now I'm happy with what I'm doing, with my family." Anaya said firmly.

Tristan looked at Anaya long ago. His mouth is in a related meeting.

"Sorry, I have to go!" Anaya turned and moved away. He did not look back, let alone give Tristan a chance.

At a crowded game location, Anaya finds Izzar standing watching Naira jumping up and down on a trampoline. Slowly Anaya approached him. Without reprimanding, Anaya held the fingers of Izzar's hand.

Izzar's hand suddenly lifted off and avoided himself. He was surprised when someone touched him. However, as soon as he saw that person was Anaya, he smiled.

"I guess who." Izzar grabbed Anaya's shoulder. "Kok didn't say you were coming? Is it done?"

"The conversation is not finished. But, I did deliberately not say here, want to ngaggetin both of you. " Anaya closed her body.

Izzar's free fingers, swiping at Anaya's cheeks. Anaya laughs. With his eyes he looked for Naira. The boy saw his presence.

"Mama!" he shouted while waving his hand.

Anaya. He felt a warm feeling that reached all his veins, and then expanded in his chest. He's happy. Only enough Izzar and Naira made him feel the happiness that extended in every pore of his body.

Fuck Tristan, job, anyone or anything.

                                                                                      ***