Story In July (End )
Day one - 19

The sky that seemed so dark outside seemed to represent everything to me, accompanied by the sunyinya condition of my house that aggravate my current situation.

Miris. At least that's what I can describe for my current condition, a no, even my life from a long time ago has been terrible. I am the fool for always hypnotizing myself by saying that in the future everything will be okay again.

In fact, it will only be a hallucination for me, look at my current situation. From this morning I just kept quiet on a king-size mattress with my hands hugging my knees.

Without someone to accompany me when I'm down like this, there's no friends or family there's nobody here.

Feeling a little thirsty I walked towards the kitchen with a shaky step I went down the stairs, and when I picked up the glass I heard the knocking on the door and then I undo my intentions.

With the same step I walked straight to the door and opened it and in that second I opened my eyes, staring in disbelief at what was in front of me do you know? the one who knocks on the door is someone I already consider a mother to me.

At that moment also my tears broke by themselves without cue I immediately embraced the figure in front of me at this time, the figure I embraced was confused by myself and stroked my shoulders gently.

"Bad fuck! Why are you just coming home now?! Mbok where do you go..! Mbok knows no, I waited until yesterday, I was alone at home! Why when I need mbok, mbok is not even on my side?! I hate the same mbok!!" I jolted with a biting tone every word I said and hugged tightly.

"N-non why? Non know... If mbok wants to nemenin sister mbok who lahiran continue mbok will already same permission non. Non why cry the same scream gini same mbok? Non scolded again the same master and mistress yah" he said while stroking the tops of my head.

When I heard the words from mbok I instead of explaining I was even more hysterical crying, while mbok who did not know what problem I was facing was even more confused.

"Bad mama mbok..!"

"Evil?! Meaning non?"

"Mothering me, you'll never come home again" I paused because it felt so hard to say that.

"You are not there" my great-grandson in a soft tone.

Instantly, the hand that stroked my head stopped, and turned to hold my shoulder and pushed me to let go of my embrace towards him.

"What do you mean?!"

"Misty. U-alah died" after saying that my crying even more so.

And also at once a pair of eyes mbok glazed and it was seen that he did not believe what I said.

"When?! Time yesterday-yesterday the mistress looks healthy-healthy non"

I told him everything, not even a single one was missed and immediately the look on his face seemed so very surprised and then came back to hug me.

When my situation was better, Mbok led me to the kitchen and then sat me on the dining table chair, then a few minutes later mbok gave rice and eggs beef eyes on it.

"Non must not have eaten, right? Eat well let mbok bribin" persuaded mbok while intending to bribe me.

"I don't want to eat mbok" I refused while pushing the plate held by mbok.

"Non must eat, fear later non even sick"

Mbok also began to bribe me with forced me to eat it, on the sidelines I asked why mbok can go home quickly then he replied that the husband of his sister had returned home so mbok can return to work.

After finishing the meal I was silent again staring blankly at the usual seat. There was a sense of annoyance, sadness and disappointment mixed in me and then not long later I felt a soft elusan that felt plucked in my head.

"Non enter the room first yuk. That's not a break, yeah"

Again helped me to stand up and embrace me, just as I was about to set foot up the stairs suddenly the door opened and saw someone I had always been looking for but he was more concerned with his affairs than his family.

Our eyes met but soon I turned my face away from him, preferring to climb the stairs while running and enter my room.

After locking the door, it felt like my body had gone back to limp and then I was back to curl up again, with various assumptions raging in my mind.

Why does he look okay? Is death just like the wind then for him? He didn't even look sad at all.

Not long after that there was someone knocking on the door of my room from outside and calling my name, from his voice alone I could guess that maybe it was papah.

"Wawa why are you avoiding papah? Papah is sorry. Papah did not answer the phone from you because papah was busy yesterday"

" .... " I did not respond at all I instead curled up more and more with the head that I drowned in both of my arms.

"Wawa don't be angry with papah dong. Open the door, baby"

" .... " again I said nothing.

"Ouh iyah papah there is a surprise for you. He said that now there is a new film in the cinema and papah have bought the tickets, so later we will go to the cinema together. Wawa if you like gini keep papah feel like talking to yourself loh"

Hearing the words of the papah I felt disbelief in what he said, how could he say it if he did not read my message.

I went out of my place and opened the door and saw the papah with a smile on his face, while I was staring flat at him.

"Honestly I can't say the word reward" I said, hearing that papah frowned.

"meaning?"

"Is that pretending not to know or doesn't know?" I paused my words.

"Great yeah...!"

"dither. The violet! You if you talk it don't be convoluted. You mean what?"

"I don't want to explain anything, the point is that papah wants to know. Papah open the phone papah continue to read messages from me" said I then immediately waltzed away.

"Loh! Where are you going..?"

"I'm going to go out for the wind. Lazy at home continues" ketusku.

I also went down the stairs and when in the middle of the stairs I stopped my steps to look at the papah, saw the papah who was checking his cellphone after that I re-entered my legs.

Just a few steps to the doorway, suddenly papah shouted my name and I turned to look at him.

"You mean what Wawa. Why don't you call papah? Why pass sms? Why don't you call the secretary?" ask papah in succession, then papah yelling mbok.

"Mmd! Mum!!" papah shouted and his voice so boomed all over the room.

"Hey-yes sir?"

"Why didn't you tell me my wife was sick. And now--" papah paused his speech and rubbed his head violently.

"Sorry sir. Mbok teh again returned home so the tea mbok do not know that miss is sick" said mbok with his head lowered deeply.

"But stay! It seems like you can go home first, right? Later after my wife healed mbok can return to the village!" sentak papah, because I did not accept papah yelling mbok then I also snapped it.

"Udah pah! Enough's enough!"

Instantly, papah and mbok jumped in shock, then simultaneously they glanced at me while I stared intently at papah.

"What does papah nalahin mbok mean? I should have asked Papah. Where have you been all this time? Papah's wife is sick again but papah prioritizes papah work more than papah family" papah who heard it was only silent a thousand languages.

"Waw I'm amazed by papah! Turns out papah tuh gini yah, already know wrong but do not want to be considered wrong"

I stared intently at him without blinking at all while papah just looked at me with a gaze that I could not read, then a moment later papah turned his face away.

"Sorry papah Wawa" he said.

For a moment I widened my eyes because for the first time I saw papah crying, for a moment I felt my heart begin to melt, my tears almost fell but I tried to hold it.

"I'm sorry papah because all this time. Papah can not be the best father for you" he explained again with the same position that is without looking at me.

"This is indeed a mistake papah, papah is obsessed with what is in front of papah. Papah never thought about your condition behind papah" the finish.

Slowly the papah raised his head glanced at me and showed his slightly reddish-colored eyes, then his hands stretched out upwards and rubbed the tops of my head after which the papah turned back and went up the stairs.

"Mbc. Why should I cry?" mbok glanced at me with a sad look.

"Non Zahwa.." lirih.

I also walked out of the house, I did not care about the people calling my name in the back.

..._o0o_...

Water began to fall from the sky and wet my body, I did not care about the thunderous flashes of lightning coming into my ears, indeed the words of papah kept ringing in my brain.

"This is indeed a mistake papah, papah is obsessed with what is in front of papah. Papah never thought about your condition behind papah"

I closed my ears hoping that the words could be permanently lost, but still the result was nil.

"Why should you say that!" my monologue.

Suddenly the rain no longer soaked my body then I raised my face up and saw Rido's foot that was paddling me, while part of his body was wet because of the rain.

"Why sit alone on a park bench? It's not cold what the rain is like" he said and smiled gently at me, I just kept quiet and turned my gaze away from him.

"It has nothing to do with my sister. Mending big brother went and pretended not to see me"

"Well... Fortunately, my brother already knows you, so my sister already knows for sure if your answer must be like that" his nose at a glance.

"Judah if you still want to rain here, brother go first!" pampered.

After saying that, Rido pulled back his umbrella and started to move his legs, I somehow felt disappointed with what he said.

Then suddenly he walked back and showed a ignorant smile towards me looking at his attitude and I frowned.

"Hehehe is not so deh" he added, as soon as I immediately turned my lazy eyeball at least I did not want to respond but my heart somehow began to feel warm.

"Sister, don't know what to say. But." brother Rido paused his words.

"No one can only give advice and it's up to you to accept it or not" he said, then his body came down to equalize my attitude with him so I didn't have to raise my head to look at him.

"What you see and what you value. Not necessarily all of that is true, because there will always be a reason behind someone's treatment of us"

Somehow I began to be interested in what Rido said, then I who had turned my gaze away from him began to glance at him and again he smiled gently at me.

"We just need to be ready to hear that excuse ... From their own mouths" he said by emphasizing the word at the end of his sentence.

My eyes glazed over and heard him "You notice what you mean by brother? If you still do not understand-" again he paused his speech.

"Well, I'll know" he added.

I bowed my head then not long after a hand was outstretched and stroked the tip of my head covered by my hijab, I gasped a little and looked at it.

After that he smiled gently but his eyes looked at me, after which he kept his umbrella on my right.

"Hurry home. Later sick" after saying that he ran away leaving me who was on the bench of the park curled up alone.

The gurgling water soaked my cheeks and my whole body, the air was so cold and piercing the body of the umbrella he kept gave a slightly different impression.

Sometimes I wonder why every time I am in trouble, he is always near me. And slowly I started to have more feelings for her.

Seriate....

^^^02 May 2022^^

^^^Wida pitriyani^^^