Story In July (End )
Day 21 - Day 21

From behind my eyes I felt a glare of light that was very disturbing to me, in the end I slowly forced myself to open my eyes.

And as soon as I opened my eyes, I saw a wall that was all white and a very pungent smell of medicine slitting into my nose.

At first glance I thought maybe this was the hospital and maybe the driver was responsible for bringing me here. Just leave me lying there even if I could die, I thought.

"Doctor! The patient is conscious" called the nurse who suddenly entered the room where I was.

At first glance I glanced at the nurse and then I looked straight ahead with an empty view.

"Sheep..!" call one of the women who feels familiar.

For a moment I was stunned to hear that voice and then I glanced towards the source of the voice coming from "Sister" my great-grandchild.

In a hurry a woman who called me ran towards me and hugged me tightly, but I was still lying on the gurney to be honest for the first time I felt her hands trembling.

Long enough we were in such a position, in the end he let go of his embrace and after that cupped both of my cheeks.

"You're not talking? You remember your brother, right? Where does it hurt? The back of your head still hurts?!" ask her repeatedly while holding both my cheeks.

"Well doctor, maybe the doctor should check it out for himself. Because somehow the patient has just been aware of the critical period" said the nurse very carefully.

I frowned and looked at the doctor in front of me with a question mark.

"Sister Riza, am I critical?" my many.

Brother Riza also glanced at me doubtfully then nodded his head in doubt also "Dad, you were critical. Because a lot of blood is coming out and there is also a very hard impact on the back of your head" the mesh at a glance.

"Lagian si! Why do you run around in the middle of the road where it rains again. Even if you want rain on the home page! Not in the middle of the road" lamented Riza.

"Make people worry. Good thing you're safe if you don't!" sentak brother Riza.

"Dok.." reprimand the nurse.

"Don't think he kept Sil he was too late to know no!" snapped brother Riza.

Well... The sister next to Riza's sister is also a very close person to Riza's sister, so Syilla's sister is also quite familiar with me. Because she always accompanied Riza when she was doing an examination about my mental disorder.

"I don't defend anyone. Just look at the icon of Riza, this is the hospital anyways also kasian Zahwa new also realized already scolded death" explained Syilla.

"Udah. Instead of being angry is not clear like that, mending a sneak check Zahwa deh" said brother Syilla.

I did not pay much attention to those who checked, from the beginning I just looked at the window with a blank look.

..._o0o_...

A few hours have passed but I did not budge from my place, there might even be many prayers that I have to pray later. It felt like my whole body was crushed even my head was very painful, but as much as possible I held all of it because I did not want to make things difficult for anyone.

Not long after the sound of the door opening, I lazily glanced at the person who opened the door.

"Dad!" calling him then coming towards me while carrying a tray filled with porridge, I could only sigh violently while turning the eyeballs lazily.

"Eat first well." he said, with a hand that was ready to bribe me instead of opening my mouth instead I laid my body and turned my back to Riza's feet.

"Please deck eat first, one mouthful. From the morning you have not eaten" he said, while I still did not budge from my place and not long after that there was a sigh of rage from Riza's sister.

"Ouh iyah brother want to tell you, if papah you will be here tonight" heard that I immediately turned my body and stared intently at brother Riza.

"Why did you tell me?" press me.

"Well... Either way papah you should know the deck" hearing the statement I screeched slowly and then rolled my eyeballs lazily.

"Let's know him. If he doesn't need to look at me and I don't want to see him" I said in a relaxed tone.

Then after saying that I returned to my original position, which was to turn my back to Riza's sister with a blanket that covered my body to the part of my head.

"Now that's the deck. Adek can not be the same papah adek, however he is papah you" said brother Riza while emphasizing the word 'your father'.

Hearing that I feel like I want to laugh, what did you say? Papa?! Funny well, which father deserves to be called a father if he is more concerned with his happiness than his son. Ironic!

"Sir...! Dengerin sister. Brother knows you are still upset with your papah, about him can not come when your mother is hospitalized, but not gini also how" break sister Riza at a glance. No, it's not because it's my brother murmuring in my heart.

"If you keep this up that there is precisely a problem will not be too complicated, continue if there is a problem it is faced instead of running away from the problem. So if this is how you're still wrong you can't be selfish Zahwa, you should be able to be more..."

"Thinking grown-up" said sister Riza by emphasizing the word.

Hearing that of course I was quite emotionally ignited, how not? I thought that Riza's sister was provoking me that here I was the wrong problem, funny, when she knew nothing about my problem and then with her wise sage she continued to lecture me.

I violently flicked the blanket I was wearing to cover my body, then I stared intently at Riza's sister.

"So I mean brother. I'm wrong and I'm right, is.. gituh?!"

"Not deck, is that so"

"Bright.. So what was it?" jedaku.

"Son doesn't know anything, so you don't have to be smart in front of me!" sewot.

"Sister isn't a deck smart ass, sister's just giving advice to you"

"Saran?!" as if.

"Saran sister said. I don't ask for advice from my sister and I don't need advice from you either, you know!" I jolted with eyes that stared hard and pierced into my heart.

Hearing that Riza's sister fell silent for a moment and then Riza's sister said something that was beyond my expectations.

"This is what you don't like, you can never hold your emotions"

Hearing that suddenly I could not speak anymore, my mouth suddenly just silent and the overflowing annoyance just now suddenly disappeared by itself.

"Riza!" call someone, who is called also glances at the origin of the voice that called out to him.

"Why are you talking about that?"

"In fact, right"

"But the condition side of Zahwa deck is different" brother Syilla paused his speech at a glance. "You forgot..?"

Hearing that as soon as the atmosphere turned silent, maybe sister Riza forgot that what she said had made my condition worse.

Maybe he forgot that the person next to him was not an ordinary person, but someone who had a mental disorder and my condition was far from okay.

"D-deck.." call brother Riza in a hesitant tone.

Instead of answering, but I immediately returned to my original position, which was to turn my back on Riza's sister with a blanket that covered my body to the part of my head.

"Sorry big brother deck, sister not---"

"Go!" as I was, immediately Brother Riza was silenced just like that.

"Don't bother me, just keep the food. If I want to be eaten later." I said.

From behind the cover my body trembled slightly because I was crying without a sound, I knew maybe it was also my fault for not being able to control my emotions and I hated this pesky mental disorder.

And it is because of this mental disorder that I always act and say without thinking again, so that makes me always shunned by people. Including the people closest to me.

"I hate myself" I said.

..._o0o_...

The blue sky is now turning a little red, yeah... The sky had changed and time was not felt now it was late afternoon.

Daritadi I just sat quietly on top of the gurney while glancing towards the window, really here is very quiet no one to look after me or even just to accompany me. No, there's no.

Not long after I heard the door open without looking, I guessed who opened the door.

"Sir, how are things now? It's a little bit off, isn't it?" ask brother Riza.

"Hen.." I replied.

Hearing my answer again, Riza sighed with frustration as if she was frustrated, perhaps even confused about what she should do now.

"Dek brother bring you apples, you eat well..? Let you heal quickly" he said, then keep the white crackle that contains the apple on top of the drawer and then Riza's brother peeled one of the apples with a knife.

"Don't do me like a little kid brother." I said without looking at him and with the same position, which is to glance at the window.

Hearing that, Riza immediately stopped her activities and glanced at me, with a frown.

"Kok you said it was rowdy? You are a child, the age of 13 years old when I did not want to be called a child" his Jeda at a glance, shaking his head several times and then he restarted his activities that had been delayed.

"It's true that you can already be called a teenager, but in the eyes of your brother is still a child" he said, then his hand began to cut the apple he had peeled after that he gave the apple to me while I just glanced towards the apple expressionlessly.

"Take the deck brother's hand started pegel tofu!"

"Sister..."

"Hem why?" tanyanya while clucking her waist.

"... Nothing" I took the apple from Riza's hands and I ate it lazily.

Sister Riza looked at me questioningly but I ignored her gaze, and preferred to look out the window.

Bored of getting out of bed and holding the iron hanging from the infusion, my feet began to walk towards the window after which I opened the window slightly wide.

There were many people passing by below, they looked like ants probably because of the location of my hospital that was above.

In silence I began to think... If I disappeared from this world I would feel better? That way I'll escape all this pain, I'm tired of all this.

All this time I felt that my life was just filled with thorns, since childhood I never felt love even I forgot when the last time papah and mamah embraced me with their affection.

Mamma...

It would be nice if I had gone first that way maybe I wouldn't have felt something like this.

If you don't know what it's like to be me, you're the worst parent I've ever met sometimes I regret having been born and raised by you.

I violently rubbed my tears that fell by itself and not long after that suddenly heard the door opened, then the footsteps sounded towards me and stopped right beside me.

"Sister..."

7⁷

"Yes deck" he said with eyes that also glanced out the window.

"I want to go home"

"Later after you recover you can go home" he said without looking at me and with the same position.

"Not at home. But I'm going home.."

Hearing that Riza's sister frowned, then looked at me with a question mark on her face "You mean?"

I glanced at my hand which had a needle stick there precisely in my right hand, Brother Riza widened her eyes because she saw me who pulled the hose infusion.

"Gluck! What are you doing?" he then held my right hand, but I immediately pulled my right.

"Please!" my sentakku.

"Dec, don't be weird. Why did you unplug that infusion of yours?"

"Don't you hear what I said? I want to go home" I said while emphasizing the word at the end of the sentence.

"What do you mean? I don't understand the same way you think"

"Don't you understand the way I think? I don't understand my own way of life"

"Free to talk to you, daritadi just convoluted" he said, then he pulled out his flat object and began to type something there.

And again Riza's eyes are perfectly rounded because of seeing me standing on the edge of the window, Riza's reflex dropped her phone.

"Grandfather!" his yell.

"What are you? Get down from here quick!" he pulled my left hand.

"Don't bother me!"

"Zahwa, this quick descent that you are doing is wrong!" his yell.

"I don't care, I don't care" I cried in the fog.

Not long after, the door opened, and the person who opened the door shouted hysterically "Zahwa!" his yell.

"Sil lo don't come here, tell someone to keep watch downstairs!"

"But"

"There is no time, have been lo cepetan seek help keep watch below. A second late can be fatal business"

With a swift brother Syilla was immediately running somewhere, while brother Riza continued to persuade me to immediately get down from the window which is now where my footing stands.

"Zah, Zah is horrified, sister is beaten! Brother please, brother please same you Please-please do not do this well. Brother please!" he said while draining a clear liquid from his eyes.

"You're not alone there's a big brother here, you don't do this deck. If you have a problem, I promise you brother will help you! Brother will finish all your problems to completion" he said.

Hearing that, I looked at her with sadness, "Sorry I, brother.." I said.

Then after that I closed my eyes slowly one by one my fingers holding the side of the window I let go and I weighed my body back.

"Zahwa!" I faintly heard Brother Riza calling my name.

Light-weight..

It felt like my body was so light even as light as cotton, my heart was racing so fast and I could even hear it.

Suddenly all the moments I passed with two absurd people were in my mind, funny. Why do I have to remember that? And for a moment I regretted what I did.

But it's too late rice has become porridge, now I'm sure this is the end of my life. And maybe this is the end of my story.

Bruugh..

There was a loud sound, but one that felt stuck here. Why don't I feel pain?

Slowly I started to open my eyes and instantly my eyes were completely wide because it turned out that the person who caught me was someone I had secretly liked all along, he was the one who was always there when I was on the doorstep of despair.

Not long after that he sat himself on the ground violently, while I was still in his arms even a breath from his nose was so felt to the area of my face.

People began to swarm around the two of us and there were even so many of them whispering to each other, then Rido's right hand held my left cheek and rubbed my head several times.

"Are you okay? No one was hurt, right?" he asked with a look of worry and panic, and I felt his hands so cold and so trembling.

Without me noticing I shook my head, while my eyes focused on her eyes that looked so red.

"Alhamdulillah.." He withered with the eye fluid that flowed from his eyes, and then the unexpected happened.

He pulled me into his arms with his hands still shaking, even he hugged me so tightly as if I would go far away from him if he let go of his embrace.

My body can only be sculpted in a place where I really do not know what I have to do now, because I myself feel very weak even just to push his body.

Not long after, Rido let go of his embrace and glanced at me again "Why do you think it was Zah?" his jade glimpsed with his sad eyes as well as with eyes that continued to emit a clear liquid.

"Why? So you want to quickly make it home huh!" she shrieked again, then she closed her eyes while fusing her forehead with mine.

Immediately my breath was held even my eyes were once again completely slumped and my heart was racing very fast as well.

At first glance I was panicking what should I do? Why does my body feel stiff and limp? I can't move.

When I was busy with my thoughts that raged suddenly heard someone calling my name, then when it arrived at the scene he was finally able to breathe a sigh of relief.

"Alhamdulillah" said brother Riza.

"Alhamdulillah, thank you Rido you have helped brother" said brother Syilla.

I frowned why did Brother Rido and sister Syilla know each other? What's their relationship? Long enough I struggled with my mind suddenly I felt my body float and it turned out that Rido's brother lifted me up.

"Where's Zahwa's room?" ask her with a breath that is severed in every word.

"Oh yeah, follow me" said Riza,

"Sil you take care of this, I'll take Zahwa to his ward"

"How come I'm the one who takes care of it?"

"Udah lo akhin ajah, not much nanya"

Without saying another word, Riza also showed me my room with Rido who carried me, finally we arrived at my hospital immediately, Riza helped Rido to put me to sleep on the safe.

Not long after that came also the sisters who brought a new infusion, then Riza's sister also stuck the infusion hose back to my right hand.

While everyone was busy with their respective work, suddenly there was a groan from someone reflex everyone was staring at someone who was moaning earlier.

"Rido's? You why?" ask brother Riza.

"N-no brother" replied Rido clumsy.

"Suster please escort her to my room" Riza said.

One of the sisters nodded and escorted Rido out of my room, I looked at Rido with a look without blinking even though he was not seen again.

"Take it easy" pause Riza at a glance.

"Maybe it was because you caught you, accidentally elbow you elbowed his chest and maybe his chest became sore" said Riza then after that began to focus on his activities.

I really feel that everything that happened today is a dream and I do not understand my own way of thinking.

Seriate...

^^22 June 2022^^^

^^^Wida pitriyani^^^